I'm down with the flu and sore throat. I sleep like nobody's business, i am tired, i am worn out. I wake myself up to get some stuff done, i start by clearing folders on my desktop (it's getting really messy). And i chanced upon this set of photos, usually i just chuck it without thinking twice, especially if you are in it. But i stopped, i hesistated, everything came flowing back again.

Do you remember? It was at this 茶餐廳 near shokudo, we were just snapping away on my new creme/white coloured handphone and commenting on how cute we both looked. It's so funny how things turned out like that huh, you just disappeared, and i don't know you anymore. There were 3 pictures that i took of you, i slowly go through the details, from your hair, your eyes, your nose, your lips, and to what you were wearing that day, a vertically dark blue/white striped blouse. I like that blouse alot actually, i don't remember if i told you about it. I go through it a couple of seconds more before i dump it in the thrash bin, and without any hesistation this time, i emptied the thrash bin.

I tend to dwell in the past alot when i am sick. I get grouchy, i reminisce, they were all so beautiful, memories that is. Love is such a wonderful thing, and in the same time, it can be a painful thing as well. I don't see myself moving forward in that aspect yet, it's more of channelling everything to something else, something which can bring me more satisfaction, more fun, more happiness i hope. And in time, i'll do the opposite again, and i hope at that time, i can find something beautiful.


What if you could go back in time, and take all those hours of pain and darkness and replace them with something better?
- Gretchen Ross, Donnie Darko

I miss you, but not you.